A Holiday for the Birds

Congress is raising the dysfunctional family Thanksgiving to new heights, not only by disagreeing over how to carve the turkey but throwing it into a shredder and leaving hard-to-digest scraps for the budget table.

This won’t be a Norman Rockwell holiday even as one political observer notes, “We don’t need to like each other. We need to listen to each other.”

Not going to happen. As both sides of the family keep squabbling, old Uncle Newt shows up, drunk with poll power, to announce they’re doing it all wrong. Back in his day, they just closed down the House and ate at McDonald’s, even as his own tab for ethics violations was $300,000.

At the head of the table, Barack Obama has relatives yelling at him to give up his seat, while Mitt Romney waits for his portion, telling lies about the President while holding on to his nomination chair with both hands.

If you think Thanksgiving is a bummer, just wait until Christmas when payroll tax cuts and the Bush bonanza for billionaires are on the menu after the new year.

My old friend Norman Rockwell must be spinning in his grave.