Thursday, January 10, 2008

Breaking News...

Vice-President Dick Cheney is under sedation after what sources describe as "a medical incident" earlier this week following reports that Iranian speedboats had menaced US warships in the Persian Gulf.

Informed sources report that Cheney, wearing President Bush's "Mission Accomplished" flight jacket, had convened an emergency meeting of the National Security Council and ordered preparations for a nuclear strike against Tehran.

According to an unnamed Defense Department official, the Vice-President cited intelligence from his own sources that the Revolutionary Guard planned to kidnap President Bush in Israel and force him to appear for questioning on Iranian TV in a college auditorium as revenge for President Ahmadinejad's humiliation at Columbia University last year.

During this "rather disjointed presentation," a Security Council member indicated off the record, the Vice-President became so agitated that medical attention was sought and Cheney is now "resting comfortably" at an undisclosed location.

US forces have been ordered to stand down and, for the remainder of President Bush's Middle East trip, Secret Service protection has been stepped up for House Speaker Nancy Pelosi in the event that she may have to serve temporarily as Acting President.

6 comments:

Unknown said...

This is big news. How come I can't find anything else about this?

Ralph Dratman said...

From whence cometh this news?

Unknown said...

There's an update...the Secret Service had to restrain Condi after she went to the White House Press Room and started to intone that she "was in charge here", even though the mikes were not on and there was no press present. It isn't clear where they took her after putting her in restraints.

Watch 'n Wait said...

Been searching around and have been told that was from Parody News Network. ;)))

Unknown said...

I can't find it as a parody news story anywhere else, either. I suppose the best way to illustrate that it is a bogus story would be to show that Cheney was conducting business during the time he was supposed to be resting at "an undisclosed location".

It is so easy for me to picture Cheney apopleptic, paranoid and raving.

Watch 'n Wait said...

One quick way would be to check how many Secret Service guys are supposedly guarding Pelosi. Yes?