Wednesday, May 09, 2007

A Surge of Cheney Diplomacy

The situation in Iraq should improve dramatically now that the Administration’s master diplomat has been dispatched there to pour oil on the troubled waters.

If the Iraqis fail to realize the insurgency in its “last throes,” the Vice President will enlighten them as he did Larry King and Wolf Blitzer two years ago.

"If you look at what the dictionary says about throes, it can still be a violent period..." he said, "the conflict will be intense, but it's intense because the terrorists understand that if we're successful at accomplishing our objective--standing up a democracy in Iraq--that's a huge defeat for them.”

Cheney will explain to Prime Minister al-Maliki that suicide bombings are only a last-ditch bid for attention and that the Iraqi parliament should cancel its two-month summer recess and stay in the perfectly safe Green Zone to smooth over Sunni and Shiite threats to quit the government.

If the Vice President’s vaunted powers of persuasion should fail, he can always fall back on the Cheney charm with the same anatomical suggestion he made to Sen. Patrick Leahy three years ago.

It will undoubtedly work as well in Baghdad as it did in Washington.

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